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Woman's hand with earplugs. Put earplugs in your funny marriage survival gift basket

A marriage survival kit is one of the cutest off-registry wedding presents or shower gifts for any soon-to-be bride or groom. What should you put in one, though? We’ve come up with a list that includes both practical and funny ideas! Let’s take a look, shall we?

What to Put in a Marriage Survival Kit Gift Basket

First things first- although we broke these down into “for her” and “for him,” all of the gifts below would work in either marriage survival kit.

For a gay or lesbian wedding, for example, you could give “hers and hers” or “his and his” gift baskets, choosing the items that best fit each partner’s personality.

Last note- this post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase through these links, we earn a small commission at no extra charge to you. 

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Now, let’s start with the perfect funny marriage survival kit bridal shower gift for her!

Marriage Survival Kit for Her

The first thing you’ll need to put up the marriage survival gift for her is, of course, a super-cute box. This one from Etsy is my favorite and you get bonus points if she’s into vintage items!

Next up, you need to decide what to fill it with, so let’s take a look at the most common items you’ll find in a marriage survival kit.

1. Lip Balm

lip balm marriage survival kit

Actually, this is supposed to go in any kit, because we all need a lip balm from time to time. However, you can make it even more special with these Eos Natural Lip Balms. She’ll have 4 great flavors to choose from!

eos USDA Organic Lip Balm - Variety Pack Lip Care to Nourish Dry Lips 100% Natural and Gluten Free Long Lasting Hydration 0.14 oz 4 Pack
  • #1 Organic Lip Balm: Variety Pack. 100% all natural sustainably sourced flavored lip balms
  • All Natural Moisture and Protection: Natural butters, oils and waxes protect and lock in moisture to give you the healthiest lips and long lasting hydration
  • Smooth Application: Swipe on this conditioning, moisturizing lip balm with all natural Shea Butter, coconut oil, jojoba oil, and beeswax leave lips feeling smooth
  • Sustainably Sourced Shea: Packed with wild grown, sustainably sourced 100% natural shea butter to make your lips feel moisturized, protected and soft
  • All Natural Lip Care: We are paraben, phthalate and gluten free; PETA certified; No products tested on animals

2. Ibuprofen

Ibuprofen

You can basically get this from any drugstore (and generic works just as well as name-brand), but it’s a must in a marriage survival kit. Hey, even the most wonderful spouse in all the land gives us a headache from time to time, right?

Advil Liqui-Gels Minis Pain Reliever and Fever Reducer, Ibuprofen 200mg, 200 Count, Fast Pain Relief
  • Pain Relief At Liquid Speed: Advil Liqui-Gels Minis provide fast pain relief for headaches, back pain, and muscle pain
  • Easy To Swallow: New Advil Liqui-Gels Minis are 33% smaller than Advil Liqui-Gels, making them easier to swallow while delivering the same powerful pain relief
  • Safe & Effective: For over 35 years, when taken as directed, Advil is a safe and effective pain reliever and fever reducer
  • Pain Relief: Advil is the world’s no. 1 selling ibuprofen brand providing safe and effective pain relief for over 35 years
  • Multiple Sizes: Advil Liqui-Gels Minis comes in 3 sizes; Add the 20, 80 or 160 count to cart to get a head start on quick and effective pain relief

3. Candy

candy for marriage survival kit

Your bride can’t go anywhere without candy, so make sure to throw some in for her! Either go for her favorites or choose this one filled with all of the greatest hits in the chocolate kingdom! 

Snickers, Twix, 3 Musketeers, Milky Way & Milky Way Midnight Minis Size Chocolate Candy Bars Variety Mix, 40-Ounce Bag (Pack of 2)
  • Contains (2) 40 ounce bags of Mars Mini Chocolate Favorites Variety Mix featuring Snickers Candy, Twix Bar, 3 Musketeers Chocolate, Milky way Candy Bar and Milky way Midnight Chocolate
  • You're not you when you're hungry: That's why Snickers bars are packed with peanuts, for that satisfying, hunger busting, chocolatey goodness; Snickers Bars bring you back to being yourself; hunger free, satisfied, and ready for anything that comes
  • Pick a side: Left Twix Bar is a crisp, flavorful cookie with deliciously chewy caramel and smoothly creamy chocolate; Right Twix Bar is deliciously smooth chocolate, crunchy delectable cookie and rich caramel; All you have to do is pick your favorite side
  • A lighter way to enjoy chocolate: 3 Musketeers Candy gives you the light, mousse like texture of fluffy, whipped, chocolate nougat, coated in a smooth, milk chocolate for a chocolate treat so light, fluffy, and delicious, it might just float away
  • Milk Chocolate: Everybody loves Milky way Milk Chocolate, but for different reasons; We like the smooth coating of rich, decadent milk chocolate that coats every scrumptious Milky way bar in a creamy, deliciously chocolatey covering

4. Schick Intuition Razor

Schick Intuition Razor

Having a razor on hand is crucial at times, and your bride definitely knows it. No, it’s not in case you get REALLY out of line, silly. Don’t be so morbid!

I’d say you add the Schick Intuition razor to the marriage survival kit, so she’s always covered.

Schick Intuition Revitalizing Moisture Razor for Women with 2 Moisturizing Razor Blade Refills and Tropical Citrus Extracts
  • SCHICK(r) INTUITION(r) FOR WOMEN PUT THE SHAVE CREAM RIGHT ON THE RAZOR!
  • LATHERS and MOISTURIZES during shaving --no need for soap, shave gel or body wash.
  • UNIQUE SKIN CONDITIONING SOLID infused with tropical citrus extracts moisturizes skin during shaving and will leave skin smooth - and you looking radiant.
  • FOUR BLADES that allow for a precise shave
  • PIVOTING HEAD that follows the contours of a woman's body to help minimize nicks and cuts

5. Mints

mints funny marriage survival kit bridal shower gift

This is just a little something to have on hand, and you have so many options to choose from. To keep the vintage vibe, you can choose these Altoids!

Trust me, her honey will be happy you thought to include these after she eats her favorite garlicky dish on date night!

Sale
Altoids Wintergreen Mints - 1.76 oz. - 6 ct.
  • Altoids Wintergreen Mints - 1.76 oz. - 6 ct.This is a 6 pack of Altoids Wintergreen Mints

6. Wine

Or better put “emergency wine.” A bottle of wine is always welcome in the marriage survival kit. Just make sure to choose something your bride loves!

If she doesn’t drink, you can include another relaxing beverage. Perhaps a package of chamomile tea? That always does the trick for me!

Marriage Survival Kit for Him

Now that we’ve settled the bride’s newlywed survival kit, let’s see what we can do for the gentlemen. For starters, check out this steampunk case from Etsy.

marriage survival kit for him from Etsy

It’s absolutely incredible. Now, let’s take a look at what you can fill it with!

1. Ear Plugs

ear plugs marriage survival kit amazon

Jokingly or not, every groom needs a pair of reliable earplugs. Maybe his honey snores? Perhaps he just wants to tune out the whole world and hear himself think? Whatever the reason, these make a hilarious addition to a marriage survival kit for grooms!

LYSIAN Ultra Soft Green Foam Earplugs 60 Pairs with Reusable Silicone Earplug, 38dB SNR Ear Plugs, Sleeping, Snoring, Work, Travel, Shooting and All Loud Events
  • Material: The earplugs are made of Super Soft and non-toxic PU Foam,
  • Noise Blocking: NRR 31dB and SNR 38dB by U.S Lab.
  • Application: Sleep, Work, Study wherever you need quiet.
  • Note: Slow Rebound Foam Ear plugs to fit in ear well.
  • One pair resuable silicone ear plugs with one portable case for gift.

2. Coupons

love coupons marriage survival kit gift

Normally, this is a gift that’s supposed to be approved by the partner. However, a set of coupons can really come in handy when he’d rather stay up and finish a Far Cry game instead of taking the trash out.

Sale
Knock Knock Vouchers for Lovers
  • Knock Knock (Author)
  • English (Publication Language)
  • 20 Pages - 03/01/2011 (Publication Date) - Knock Knock (Publisher)

3. Candles

candles for marriage survival kit basket

Whoever came up with the weird idea that men don’t like candles was out of their mind. Guys love a good soak in a tub by candlelight, too! Check out this candle set that any groom would love! Maybe he can use it to drop a hint to his honey that they need a romantic night in together.

Sale
Hand-Poured Twin-Pack Relaxation Candles Gift Set: Warm and Welcoming Scents - Ideal for Aromatherapy, Zen, Chakra Balancing, Yoga - Includes Candle Holder & Wick Trimmer - Candles for Home Scented
  • PREMIUM CANDLES GIFT SET – Divine scented candles for home and heart. A natural blend of soy wax with luxurious scents from the finest artisans in candle fragrances. Hand poured aromatherapy candles for home scented serenity.
  • SIGNATURE SCENTED CANDLES – Devotion is an intimate blend of warm maple with hints of cinnamon & citrus. Serenity is an alluring blend of divine cacao with hints of vanilla & amber.
  • DECOR DESIGNED – Wooden bowl houses our premium gun metal candle containers and comes with a designer copper coated wick trimmer. A truly elegant set of decorative candles to enhance the home & heart.
  • AROMATHERAPY – Soy candles to calm the mind and body and provide a mood enhancing atmosphere of up to 30hrs burn time (200grams/7oz)
  • THE PERFECT GIFT – Thank You – Birthday - Wedding – Anniversary - Housewarming – Christmas - Stress Relief Candles Gift Set – Mood Enhancing Bath Candles - Luxury Candles for Mother’s Day – Unique Candles as Spiritual Gifts for Women, Men & You.

4. Googly Eyes

googly eyes for funny marriage survival kit

This one is mostly just for fun, but the groom will definitely make his partner laugh when he discovers that googly eyes can be put on anything! It just might spark a lifelong game between them to see who can find them first each day.

It’s amazing, really, how something so small can create the perfect way to really bond as a couple. Even more amazing to know that it all starts with you and your marriage survival kit basket!

CNLEIFU 100pcs Sewing Wiggle Eyes Sew-On Googly Eyes for Toy DIY Teddy Bear Animal Plush Doll Puppet Crafts Diameter:1/2"(12mm)
  • 100pcs Sew-On Wiggle Eyes
  • Diameter:1/2"(12mm)
  • Suitable for puppets, dolls, teddy bears, plush animals, toy DIY, crafts, sewing and crochet projects, hand making.

5. Chocolate

Hey, grooms need chocolate too! So make sure to throw some candy in your DIY marriage survival kit for him! I really love these vintage-style bars by Seattle Chocolate.

Seattle Chocolates Seasons Bar Trio 3 x 2.5 oz
  • A delicious 7.5-ounce Seattle Chocolates Holiday Milk and Dark Chocolate 3 bar gift set
  • Smooth, melt away texture results in a perfectly blended confection that literally melts on the tongue
  • All-natural; gluten free; non gmo; kosher certified; Seattle Chocolates sources only ethically traded chocolate
  • Premium chocolate carefully prepared in small batches with the highest quality all-natural chocolate with no preservatives or additives
Want to make your own DIY marriage survival kit gift basket? Check out 10 clever ideas on what to put in one for him or her!

What else? Well, you can throw in some more practical items, too! Perhaps matches to go with the candles? Round everything out with a gift card. Maybe one to their favorite restaurant, or perhaps to a good local winery!

Just have fun with it. Think about what would make them laugh. After all, that’s the whole point of a funny gift like this.

Have you decided how your marriage survival kit will look like yet? Share below!

Andreea Juganaru
Andreea Juganaru

Andreea is a very passionate content creator and her purpose is to provide you with the most interesting articles, while constantly discovering new facts. She’s been freelance writing for the past five years and has created numerous articles and educational materials while managing her own blog.

Last update on 2021-02-25 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon Product Advertising API

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