Being chosen as the best man is an honor—and a responsibility. Among the stag do planning and ring safeguarding, your defining moment is the best man speech. This guide will walk you through every step of creating a memorable, heartfelt, and genuinely funny best man speech that resonates with the couple and the crowd, ensuring your words are remembered for all the right reasons.
1. Start Strong: Preparation and Mindset
Begin Early—Don’t Wing It
Procrastination is the enemy of a great best man speech. Start brainstorming and drafting at least two months before the wedding8. This gives you time to collect stories, refine your jokes, and rehearse until you’re confident and polished. Preparation is half the battle.
Know Your Audience
Tailor your speech for the crowd. Weddings bring together people from all walks of life—grandparents, colleagues, childhood friends, and sometimes even the boss. Avoid inside jokes that only a few will get, and keep it family-friendly8. If you’re unsure about a joke or story, leave it out5.
2. Structure: The Blueprint of a Great Speech
A well-structured best man speech is easier to write, easier to deliver, and much more enjoyable for your audience. Here’s a proven structure to follow48:
Section | Purpose |
---|---|
Introduction | Who you are and your relationship to the groom |
Thank Yous | Acknowledge previous speakers, parents, and anyone who made the day special |
Anecdotes | Share meaningful or funny stories about the groom |
The Couple’s Story | Briefly mention their love story and what makes them great together |
Comments on Spouse | Welcome the spouse and share positive observations |
Observations as a Couple | What makes their relationship unique and inspiring |
Toast | End with a heartfelt wish for their future |
Tip: Keep your speech under 1,300 words—about five minutes. Anything longer and you risk losing your audience’s attention8.
3. Crafting Content: Make It Personal and Thoughtful
Find Your Theme
Every great speech has a unifying idea. Brainstorm your favorite stories about the groom and look for a theme that ties them together—loyalty, adventure, growth, or humor1. This theme will help your speech feel cohesive and meaningful.
Anecdotes: The Heart of Your Speech
Personal stories are what make your speech memorable. Choose one or two anecdotes that highlight the groom’s character, your friendship, or the couple’s journey together45. Keep stories concise and relevant—avoid rambling or unrelated tales.
Balance Humor and Heart
Humor is essential, but don’t rely solely on jokes. The most impactful speeches blend laughter with genuine sentiment. Share your feelings about the groom and the couple—this vulnerability is what guests will remember14.
Welcome the Spouse
Don’t focus only on your relationship with the groom. Celebrate the spouse and what they bring to the groom’s life. Share a positive observation or a story that includes them, and make them feel truly welcomed into your circle34.
Keep It Positive and Appropriate
Avoid roasts, embarrassing stories, or anything that could make the couple uncomfortable. If you have to ask yourself, “Is this appropriate?”—it’s not1. Your job is to uplift, not upstage or embarrass.
4. Writing Tips: From Blank Page to Brilliant Speech
Draft a Skeleton First
Don’t try to write the perfect speech in one go. Start with a rough outline—jot down your key points, stories, and jokes. Once you have the structure, flesh out each section with details and transitions34.
Edit Ruthlessly
Once your draft is done, cut it by 20%. Shorter stories, punchier jokes, and tighter language will make your speech more engaging8. Read it aloud and listen for awkward phrasing or sections that drag.
Personalize Your Thank-Yous
Generic thank-yous are forgettable. Personalize your gratitude to the couple’s parents, previous speakers, and anyone who made the day special8. A specific compliment or a short story can make these acknowledgments stand out.
5. Delivery: How to Own the Room
Practice Makes Perfect
A brilliant speech on paper can fall flat if poorly delivered. Practice out loud, in front of a mirror or with friends, until the words feel natural and you’re comfortable with your timing and tone84. Record yourself to catch any nervous habits or unclear sections.
Body Language and Eye Contact
Stand tall, use open gestures, and make eye contact with the crowd. Avoid fidgeting or reading word-for-word from your notes—connection is key1. If you need cue cards, keep them minimal.
Speak Slowly and Clearly
Nerves can make you rush. Slow down, articulate your words, and pause for laughter or applause. Let the audience react and enjoy the moments you create.
Limit Your Drinks
One drink might calm your nerves, but more than that can ruin your delivery. Save the celebration for after your toast1.
6. Creative Touches: Make It Unforgettable
Inject Your Personality
If you have a creative talent—singing, poetry, or even a short skit—consider incorporating it into your speech7. Creative elements can make your speech unique and memorable, but only if they feel authentic to you.
Involve the Audience
Pose a question, reference shared experiences, or give a shout-out to mutual friends. Audience engagement can boost energy and make your speech more inclusive1.
7. Common Pitfalls to Avoid
- Don’t Apologize for Being Nervous: Most people won’t notice unless you draw attention to it1.
- Don’t Upstage the Couple: The focus should always be on the newlyweds, not your performance1.
- Don’t Go Off Script: Stick to your prepared material—improvised jokes or stories can backfire.
- Don’t Mention Exes, Money, or Controversial Topics: Keep it classy and celebratory18.
8. The Toast: Your Final Flourish
End your speech with a heartfelt toast. Wish the couple love, happiness, and a wonderful future together. Keep it sincere and brief—raise your glass and invite the room to join you in celebrating the couple’s new journey48.
Best Man Speech Checklist
- Start early and brainstorm stories
- Outline your speech structure
- Personalize your thank-yous
- Choose one or two strong anecdotes
- Balance humor with heartfelt sentiment
- Welcome the spouse and celebrate the couple
- Edit for clarity and length
- Practice your delivery
- Prepare your body language and eye contact
- End with a sincere toast
Conclusion: Be Yourself and Celebrate the Couple
The best man speech isn’t about being the funniest or most eloquent person in the room—it’s about sharing your unique perspective on the couple’s love story and celebrating their future together. Be genuine, be prepared, and most importantly, be yourself. With these actionable tips, your best man speech will not only be memorable but deeply meaningful for the couple and every guest in the room.
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Chrissy Paige is the founder, owner, and managing editor of LoveYouWedding.com
Chrissy Paige is a renowned wedding expert and a trusted name in the industry. With over a decade of experience, Chrissy has dedicated herself to creating unforgettable wedding experiences for couples worldwide. Her creative vision, combined with her ability to understand her clients’ dreams, ensures that every event she orchestrates is a true reflection of their love story.
You can reach Chrissy on Pinterest, Facebook or at loveyouweddingteam@gmail.com
Last update on 2025-08-15 / Affiliate links / Images from Amazon Product Advertising API