71 Funny Anniversary Quotes For Couples, Friends, And Family

Anniversaries are a time of celebration. They are fantastic milestones to reach, regardless of if it’s your 1st, 10th, or 50th. They are very serious dates, but that doesn’t mean that the celebration can’t be fun, and what’s more fun than a bit of humor? 

As you spend more time with someone, you create lots of memories, and when you spend that time with them positively, lots of those memories will be something you can laugh about!

Whether you are looking for funny anniversary quotes for your husband, wife, family, or friends, we have put together a list of plenty that you can use whenever the timing feels right!

Adding a funny anniversary quote to a card or gift can not only make your loved ones laugh, but it can also show them how much you appreciate their sense of humor and the joy they bring to your life.

Funny Anniversary Quotes For Your Husband

If you’ve got a good husband, then chances are he loves to laugh! The best jokes are the ones where you can poke a bit of harmless fun, and these quotes are perfect for that! 

  1. Here’s to another year of loving, laughing, and putting up with each other’s mothers! Happy anniversary to you, my darling husband. I love you.
  2. Husbands are the best people to share a secret with because they never listen anyway. Happy Anniversary my darling! 
  3. Behind every great man – there’s a woman rolling her eyes. Happy Anniversary my love!
  4. Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age – as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
  5. Marrying a man is like buying something you’ve been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn’t always go with everything else. 
  6. My husband said he needed some space – so I locked him outside!
  7. I shave my legs for you. It must be love. Happy anniversary to you, my husband. 
  8. I’m so privileged that you chose me to be that special woman in your life who will forever have the honor of picking up your socks and washing your underwear. Happy anniversary, my love! 
  9. My dear husband, I want you. To do more around the house.
  10. Marriage is the name of sacrifice and understanding each other, and I am happy that you have learned it very well. Happy anniversary, dear husband!
  11. Sometimes I look at you and I just can’t help but feel happy for you. After all, you married the world’s most beautiful and brilliant woman. Happy anniversary, dearest husband.
  12. I still love you. Even though you fart in your sleep. Happy anniversary to my lovely husband! 
  13. I fall in love with you each and every day. Except for yesterday. Yesterday you were really annoying! Happy anniversary to my dear husband. 
  14. Happy Anniversary, my love, I’ll always be by your side. Someone has to keep you out of trouble!
  15. Happy Anniversary, sweetheart, you know how to sweep me off my feet. If only you knew how to sweep the floor.
  16. Happy Anniversary, sweetie. To clarify, when you said you’d spend your life showing me how much you love me, was that another one of your jokes that I didn’t get?
  17. Honey, you said you wanted this anniversary to rock, so I bought us a pair of rocking chairs.
  18. Happy Anniversary, my love, There’s no one else I’d rather die with.
  19. This anniversary, I want you to know I’ll follow you wherever you go, thanks to the GPS tracker on your phone.
  20. Happy Anniversary, honey. God is still laughing over how he put us together!

Funny Anniversary Quotes For Your Wife

If you’ve been married for quite a while, your wife is probably used to your bad jokes, but if your relationship is good, she will definitely see the humor in some of them!

Use some of these quotes on your wife for your next anniversary, and make her laugh on your special day! 

  1. In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision-maker. Happy Anniversary my love. 
  2. I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; by then it was too late!
  3. Some people ask the secret to our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music, and dancing… she goes on Tuesdays, and I go on Fridays.
  4. When people ask me about what makes a happy marriage, I simply tell them that the wife is always right. When you think she’s wrong, hit yourself on the head and remember that the wife is always right. Happy anniversary to my wife!
  5. My wife and I have been married for forty-seven years, and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.
  6. A wedding band is the smallest handcuff ever made, I’m glad I chose my cellmate wisely. Happy anniversary to my wife! 
  7. To my wife on our anniversary, I want you to know how much I’ve enjoyed annoying you all this time and how excited I am to keep doing it in the future.
  8. I love you so much, I’d fight a bear for you. Well, not a grizzly bear because they have claws, and not a panda bear because they know Kung Fu… but a Care Bear, I’d definitely fight a Care Bear for you. Happy Anniversary to you my wife. 
  9. True love is letting your wife max out your credit card. Really, it is. Let’s celebrate our love while we still have some money left. Sincere anniversary wishes to my loving husband.
  10. Happy Anniversary to my old ball and chain! There is no one else I would rather be stuck with!
  11. You said nothing would make you happier than new jewelry for our anniversary, so I bought you nothing. Happy anniversary to my wife. 
  12. You’re doing such an incredible job with this wife stuff. 10/10 would marry again.
  13. Roses are red, violets are blue, the dog is my favorite, but you’re okay too! Happy anniversary to my dear wife.
  14. Today we recognize and celebrate one of the greatest achievements of all time – you’re staying married to me for X amount of years. Happiest of anniversaries.
  15. For every marriage to be a success, the woman should have her own bathroom. Happy anniversary sweetheart!
  16. I am thankful that today is another anniversary. Thanks for getting closer to ‘’death do us part’’. Happy anniversary, dear wife!
  17. I love my wife more than anything in the world. Well, except maybe my car. Happy anniversary!
  18. You may think that our marriage is not very good. Let me tell you a fact: Only a deaf husband and a blind wife can make a perfect couple. May we keep on adoring our imperfect marriage in the coming years!
  19. Baby, you’ve grown so much this last year and honed your nagging skills to perfection. Happy anniversary! 
  20. Happy Anniversary, baby, one more year together. Every morning I’m surprised, ah… I mean grateful!… that you’re still here. 

Funny Anniversary Quotes For Friends

If your friends have a wedding anniversary coming up and you’re close to them, then they will absolutely love these funny quotes.

Try these quotes out on your friends and family’s next wedding anniversary! 

  1. Never laugh at your wife’s choices. You are one of them! Happy anniversary!
  2. You make it look so easy annoying someone for eternity! Happy anniversary to both of you. 
  3. A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance, and tenacity. The order varies for any given year. Happy anniversary! 
  4. Happy anniversary from someone who knows more about the inner workings of your marriage than any third party should.
  5. Marriage is a commitment where one person is always right, and the other is just called the husband! Happy anniversary! 
  6. Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the start, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade! Happy anniversary!
  7. Your marriage is the perfect example of true love. You don’t get annoyed when he hogs the television to watch sports, and he doesn’t get annoyed when you paint the bedroom pink. Congratulations on another anniversary!
  8. I hope you have a great anniversary and that this exempts me from ever having to remember it again.
  9. Happy anniversary to a couple whose love and devotion after so many years continue to freak the hell out of everyone.
  10. Well, you made it another year without one of you ending up dead or in jail. I call that a win!
  11. Happy Anniversary. Just imagine if the two of you hadn’t swiped right!
  12. Happy Anniversary. If the two of you were socks, you’d be a matching pair.
  13. Happy Anniversary to a couple who were like two ships passing in the night, only ones who crashed into each other.
  14. To the anniversary couple, support each other’s dreams, just make sure none end up being nightmares!
  15. Happy Anniversary. A little advice is to never make fun of each other’s choices since you chose each other.

Funny Anniversary Quotes For Your Parents

If your folks have been together since you were born, then you’ve likely celebrated a lot of their wedding anniversaries.

It’s fun to make anniversary jokes as a kid, but when you get older, you understand them a bit better. Plus, you’ve had a front-row seat to their lives together, so it’s safe to say that you know their marriage pretty well! 

  1. Best of luck to you on your anniversary, Mom and Dad. It’s a special day for me as well as you because it would have been impossible for me to send this message without you. Thanks.
  2. I wish to have a good marriage like yours one day. One that’s blessed with mutual respect, love, understanding, and a wonderful child like me. You’re welcome. Have a marvelous anniversary.
  3. Happy anniversary from your favorite, most successful good looking child.
  4. They say marriage makes you live longer – this must be true because you two have been married for eternity. Here’s to forever, mom and dad! Happy anniversary!
  5. Marriage is finding that one person who puts up with your drama, admires your weirdness, and still tells you they love you at the end of the day, and that’s definitely what you have! Happy anniversary mom and dad! 
  6. I couldn’t imagine where I’d be without the two of you – literally! Happiest of anniversaries to my wonderful and amazing parents.
  7. The longer two people stay together, the more they look like each other.” Hopefully, mom won’t grow a matching beard, dad. Happy anniversary to you two lovebirds! 
  8. Let’s celebrate the day you gave up on finding anyone better than mom. Happy anniversary to the best parents in the world. 
  9. It is remarkable how you have both tolerated each other for so long! Happy anniversary mom and dad, and may you continue tolerating each other for eternity! 
  10. When someone is murdered, the police investigate the spouse first. That tells you everything you need to know about marriage! Happy Anniversary mom and dad! 
  11. God has truly compensated you for that face he gave you a while back by giving you such a beautiful wife. I’m glad you’ve built such a beautiful and happy life together. Happy anniversary mom and dad! 
  12. You two go together just like salt and pepper, bacon and eggs, peanut butter and jelly… Happy anniversary!
  13. Leo Tolstoy wrote a book about you two. It was titled “War and Peace.” Happy anniversary to my parents!
  14. I have given up watching comedy shows because I love watching the two of you quarrel in that comical fashion that you always do. Happy anniversary!
  15. In the Olympic Games of marriage, you’ve won medals for producing smart, handsome children like me. Happy anniversary, Mum and Dad.
  16. Mum, you might be losing your memory, but Dad will make sure that both of you continue to make new memories. Happy anniversary to you both!


Humor always makes a special day even better, especially when you’re tasteful about it! These anniversary quotes are designed to bring a bit of light humor and joy to the day and make everyone involved smile. 

Try these quotes out for yourself and make your anniversary a day to remember!

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