100+ Funny Anniversary Quotes For Every Milestone

Anniversaries are special occasions that deserve to be celebrated with love, laughter and joy. Whether you’re celebrating your first anniversary or your 50^th, alone or with your loved ones, funny anniversary quotes are a great way to lighten the atmosphere and have a good time. After all, laughter is the best medicine! 

In this blog post, we’ve examined some of our favorite funny anniversary quotes that will surely bring a smile to your face. So, get ready for some hilarity! 

Hilarious Quotes for Newly Married Couples

Whether you’re looking for something sentimental, serious, sweet or funny, we’ve got the perfect newly married anniversary quote for you and your spouse. Go ahead and share a little laughter and love on this special day!”

• “To love is nothing. To be loved is something. But to love and be loved, that’s everything” — T. Tolis
• “The best thing about being married is that you can always blame your spouse when something goes wrong.” — Unknown
• “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” — Mignon McLaughlin
• “My husband and I have never considered divorce… murder sometimes, but never divorce.” — Joyce Brothers
• “My wife says I never listen to her. At least I think that’s what she said.” — Anonymous
• “My husband and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.” — Anonymous
• “The secret to a long and happy marriage is an understanding wife and too much money.” — Arnold Schwarzenegger
• “The secret to a lasting relationship is not in never having disagreements or taking each other for granted, but rather in learning how to resolve disagreements and give each other the attention and care that is needed on a daily basis.” —John Gottman
• “My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me.” —Winston Churchill
• “The happiest marriages I know are based on mutual respect and not complete agreement about everything. It seems to me that if you have those two ingredients…you can put up with anything life throws at you.” —Nick Hornby
• “A great marriage consists of keeping promises made to each other when it matters most – when they are put to the test.” – Unknown
• “Mаrrіаgе hаѕ nо guаrаntееѕ. If thаt’ѕ whаt уоu’rе lооkіng for, gо lіvе wіth а саr bаttеrу.” – Ermа Bоmbесk
• “It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” – Friedrich Nietzsche
• “A good marriage is for each other, and together against the world.” – Unknown
• “A happy marriage is a conversation that always seems too short.” – Andre Maurois
• “Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” – Lao Tzu
• “Kеер уоur еуеѕ wіdе open before marriage, hаlf ѕhut аftеrwаrdѕ.” – Bеnјаmіn Frаnklіn
• “Great marriages are contagious. If you want one, surround yourself with couples who have one.” – Unknown
• “If you want a great marriage, treat it like you are the CEO of it.” – Unknown
• “Thеrе іѕ nоthіng іn thе wоrld lіkе thе dеvоtіоn оf а mаrrіеd wоmаn. It іѕ a thing no married man knоwѕ аnуthіng аbоut.” – Oѕсаr Wіlde.
• “A good marriage allows for change and growth in individuals and in the way they express their love.” – Pearl S. Buck
• “If you want to have a great marriage, don’t ever stop dating your wife and don’t ever stop flirting with your husband.” – unknown
• “Bеfоrе уоu маrrу а реrѕоn уоu ѕhоuld fіrѕt mаkе thе uѕе а соmрutеr with ѕlоw іntеrnеt sо ѕее whо thеу rеаllу аrе.” – Wіll Fеrrеll
• “A strong marriage never has two strong people at the same time. It has a husband and a wife taking turns in being strong for each other in the moments when the other one feels weak.” – Unknown
• “A good marriage isn’t something you find; it’s something you make.” – Gary L. Thomas
• “Marriage іѕ not јuѕt ѕріrіtuаl соmmunіоn, іt іѕ аlѕо rеmеmbеrіng tо tаkе оut thе trаѕh.” – Jоусе Brоthеrѕ
• “Fоr marriage tо bе а ѕuссеѕѕ, еvеrу wоmаn аnd еvеrу mаn ѕhоuld hаvе hеr аnd hіѕ оwn bathroom. Thе еnd.” – Cаthеrіnе Zеtа-Jоnеѕ
• “In оldеn tіmеѕ, ѕасrіfісеѕ wеrе mаdе аt thе аltаr, а рrасtісе whісh іѕ ѕtіll vеrу muсh рrасtісеd.” – Helen Rowland

Check out these other similar posts:

• 16 Year Anniversary Quotes
• The Best 50th Anniversary Quotes For Your Golden Anniversary
• Anniversary Quotes For Your First Year Of Marriage

Anniversary Quotes for Him

• “It’s been a year already, and I still can’t get enough of you. I love you more and more every day.”
• “I’m so grateful to have you in my life, and I can’t wait to see what the next year brings.”
• “Here’s to another year of laughing together, loving each other and making memories.”

• “I can’t imagine spending my life with anyone else but you. Happy anniversary!”
• “Thank you for being my everything – I love you more than words could ever say.”

Anniversary Quotes for Her

• “The first year of marriage is the hardest. The rest is just a piece of cake.” —Unknown

• “I would spend eternity strolling through my garden if I had a flower for every time I thought about you.” —Anonymous
• “If equal affection cannot be, let the more loving one be me.” — W.H. Auden
• “I wish there were a stronger word than love to describe how I feel about you.”  — Faraaz Kazi

Funny Quotes to Celebrate Long Years of Marriage

In many respects, nothing compares to the beauty of a long-lasting marriage. It is crucial to keep the love and laughter alive to get through the hard times. For this reason, we have compiled a list of humorous anniversary quotes to share with you on this memorable day. These quotations will make you laugh, give you hope or whatever you need. Grab your partner and raise a glass to your (hopefully) long and happy marriage.

• “The great thing about marriage is that it gives us a chance to grow up.” — Gene Perret
• “A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance and tenacity. The order varies for any given year.” — Paul Sweeney
• “The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.” — Oprah Winfrey
• “The secret to having a happy marriage is finding the right person. You know they’re right if you love to be with them all the time.” — Julia Child
• “My husband and I never let each other forget how much we love each other. He always says, ‘I love you,’ before he goes to work, and I say it back. And he calls me during the day to check in, which I love.” — Reese Witherspoon

Funny Anniversary Quotes for Husband

• “The best thing about our marriage is that every year it gets funnier.” — Unknown
• “I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” — Rita Rudner
• “My wife says I can’t take her anywhere. I took her to a gas station.” — Rodney Dangerfield
• “Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning cartwheels across a tightrope or eating with chopsticks; it looks easy until you try it.” — Helen Rowland

Funny Anniversary Quotes for Wife

• “The best thing about our marriage is that we always look forward to coming home to each other.” — Unknown
• “We may not have it all together, but together we have it all.” — Unknown
• “My wife is my best friend and closest confidante. I am so grateful for her presence in my life.” — Unknown

Quotes to Inspire You in Your Marriage

• “Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade.” —Anonymous
• “If you want your wife to listen to you, don’t talk to her.” —Anonymous
• “By all means, marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.” – Socrates
• “Never question your spouse’s choices; they did, after all, choose you.” – Anonymous 
• “Marriage has no guarantees. If that is what you want, go buy a car battery.” – Erma Bombeck 
• “Four most important words in a marriage: I will do the dishes.” – Anonymous
• “Marry someone who gives you the same feeling you have when you see your food coming into a restaurant.” – Anonymous
• “When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.” – Prince Philip
• “Mеn mаrrу wоmеn wіth thе hоре thеу wіll nеvеr сhаngе. Wоmеn mаrrу mеn wіth thе hоре thеу wіll сhаngе. Invariably, thеу аrе both dіѕарроіntеd.” – Albеrt Eіnѕtеіn
• “Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won’t even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.” -Helen Rowland
• “After 45 years of marriage, when I have an argument with my wife, if we don’t agree, we do what she wants. But, when we agree, we do what I want.” -Jacques Pepin
• “If you want your wife to listen to you, then talk to another woman; she will be all ears.” -Sigmund Freud

Funny Anniversary Quotes for Parents

Parents are the people who love us unconditionally, even when we make mistakes. They are always there for us, no matter what. So, let’s always take a moment to celebrate our parents on their special day with some funny anniversary quotes. Here are some of our favorite funny anniversary quotes for parents:

• To my amazing parents: Thank you for putting up with me all these years! I’m so lucky to have you both in my life. Happy anniversary!
• To the best parents in the world: I wouldn’t be the person I am today without your unconditional love and support. Thank you for everything. I love you!
• Parenting is not easy, but it’s worth it when we see our children grow into amazing adults. Thanks for being great role models and always being there for us. Happy anniversary!
• “For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end.” – Catherine Zeta-Jones
• “When someone is murdered, the police investigate the spouse first. That tells you everything you need to know about marriage.” – Katherine Hepburn.
• “Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.” – Anonymous
• Nobody cared for us like Mom, and nobody protected us like Dad. On this day, we wish both of you a very happy and romantic anniversary!
• “The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved; loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves.” – Victor Hugo
• Thank you, Mom and Dad, for everything you’ve done for me throughout my life. I’m so grateful to have such loving and supportive parents.
• “The older you get, the easier it is to convince your parents that you know what you’re doing.” – Unknown

• “My parents got married on an escalator. 57 years later, they’re still going up!” – Unknown
• “My parents have been married for so long I don’t even know which one of them is the original spouse!” – Unknown

Funny Anniversary Quotes for Friends

You’ve known from the beginning that these two were meant for each other. Celebrate their love for one another while poking a little fun at them too. They are sure to remember the funny wedding anniversary quotes you include in their card or gift.

• “The best thing about having a best friend is that no matter what life throws your way, you know you’ll always have each other.” — Unknown
• “Friends are the family we choose for ourselves.” — Edna Buchanan
• “A true friend is someone who sees the pain in your eyes while everyone else believes the smile on your face.” — Unknown
• “The very best friends apparently make the very best spouses. May your capacity for love continue to grow year after year.” — Unknown
• Friends like the two of you deserve all the happiness in the world. Best wishes for a happy anniversary and many joyful returns. — Unknown
• “To the world, you may be just one person, but to one person, you may be the world.” — Dr. Seuss
• “A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.” — Elbert Hubbard
• “Friends are the family we choose for ourselves.” — Edward Abbey
• “The greatest gift of life is friendship, and I have received it.” — Hubert H. Humphrey
• “A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” — Walter Winchell
• Marriage is a healthy workshop where the husband works and the wife forever shops! Happy anniversary! — Unknown
• When someone is murdered, the spouse is always investigated first. Remember that! —Unknown
• It was a great honor to stand on the altar with you as you began your lives as a married couple. May you always be happy together. — Unknown

Final Thoughts

Anniversaries are a time to celebrate the love and connection between two people, so why not get creative with your anniversary quotes? Whether you’re looking for romantic, funny or heartfelt anniversary quotes for him or her, there are plenty of options that will make your partner feel special. From classic movie lines to silly puns, do what you can to show how much you care and keep things light-hearted on this special day!

We hope you enjoyed these funny anniversary quotes. If you’re looking for more anniversary quotes, be sure to check out Pinterest and our other blog posts.